Secrets are like termites


You can never lie to yourself, so don’t even try

There’s a certain valor in holding a secret for a friend, but your own secrets are pests gnawing at you from the inside out. Even the smallest secret eats away at your integrity. Secrets are like termites; keep their numbers small.

The impulse to keep secrets is understandable. You hide things to maintain control, but control is an illusion. You have to let life happen, and it’s not always smooth.

When you keep secrets, your brain must keep “two sets of books.” When you work in secret, you deny yourself feedback (But You do not welcome all feedback and when you live in secret, you deny yourself community.

You may never be able to control your thoughts, because You are not your thoughts. But because you can control your speech, it behooves you to tell the whole truth.

Be truthful with yourself. Don’t tolerate your own excuses, don’t allow inaccurate self-talk. You can never lie to yourself, so don’t even try. If you know something’s wrong, say something. Be a defender of truth. It sounds hard, but it’s infinitely easier than spinning endless plates of fabrication.

And none of those things can happen in secret.